Bundle of Joy

[opabinia]

As I approached the salad bar at Whole Foods, I saw a young woman who was carrying her infant in a front-mounted sling. I ended up standing behind her at a lettuce bin. I couldn't see her plate, so it looked like she was shoveling tongs-full of arugula directly into the baby's abdomen. This was so striking that I decided to tell her. She cracked up with surprising enthusiasm, which caused the now wide-eyed baby to jiggle up and down a little.

My receipt says my cashier was SULTAN. Man, imagine that career downturn.